The Evil Word

I recently went through this crazy breakup and am attempting to patch up the wounds lately but during this whole massacre, I've come to hate the word it. It just pisses me off. I never minded the word, I never even really thought about the word but I've come to conclusion that it's a blanket that people use to cover up what's actually going on. I mean, in the right context I don't mind it, but if you use it the wrong way, it could really get on my nerves. It could stand for ANYTHING. My boyfriend... well, ex-boyfriend... attempting to fix it- friend, used it a lot and I never mentioned it but I've been meaning to blog about it. I don't exactly know what blogging about it would do but I feel it is necessary. So here is how I've come to hate this tiny word. My boyfriend fucked up big time recently but he'll never directly state what he did. He'll always say, "I'm so sorry for doing it.", "I didn't mean to do it.", "I don't know how it happened.". I have no idea why it pisses me off but I think it's so strange that this life altering thing, although high school breakups sounds silly, yes life altering thing can be boiled down to this two letter word. And maybe that's why I hate it, because it represents everything I hate. I've never actually realized how weird the word it is. I used the word it in my last sentence but meanwhile it is representing my hatred for the word. It's this mind swirling word that if you think about too much, could get you a bit dizzy. It's kind of like a crutch, when you use the word it, it takes the hurt out of the situation and puts it into a teeny word. This poor word, has to sum up two months of pain. That's what crying, screaming, hating, loving has all boiled down to. "It was bad times" It? I went through so much, he did so much and yet both situations are still represented by it. In my opinion, this word should have never been created because evidently it gives people the easy way out. What would you rather say.... "I'm sorry for fucking another girl two days after breaking up with you", or "I'm sorry for doing it".... yeah that's what I thought. Slowly but surely, I will erase this stupid word from my vocabulary... or at least try.