My Brain

I find it completely fascinating, that although i have had complete ownership of my brain and my thoughts for hmm let see... roughly 16 years now... i still can't control them. Why is it that during the course of me talking to myself (yes i talk to myself), that I will tell my brain to NOT think of something. I gave my brain specific instruction, but still my brain feels the need to defy my wants and needs and think of that exact thing! BUT, it's not just what i didn't want to think of, it expands and thinks of neighboring ideas that would get me equally pissed off. Wonderful. Thank you brain! This makes me think. Do i control my brain... When i was younger, i used to think there were little green men in my brain telling me what to do, think, and say and that idea is starting to make more sense than any scientist or brain doctor ever could. If i can't control my thoughts, who is? It has to be someone else. Someone evil. Because, although i pass by someone and tell them i love their sweater, under my breath i confess how hideous it is and question if she was high while purchasing this knitted Arabian sweater that has Christmas written in glitter. Why did i tell her i liked her sweater if i didn't really like it? It honestly just comes out. One of my worst features is, i always compliment people i hate (don't take this in offense if i have complimented you unless you know that i hate you.. then you can get offended)It is so horrible. But i really can't control it. I know i compliment people who aren't exactly worthy of compliments because i realize that although their sweater is hideous, they bought it, loved it enough to wear it to school, and probably have not gotten any compliments on it, if anything they've gotten stares and insults so, if i tell someone their hideous sweater is nice, it's not hurting anyone. But, i still find it weird that I'm compelled to do it. I can also say, and I'm sure a lot of people do it, I'm like a fashion critic walking through the hallways. But why? I don't do it on purpose and sometimes i don't even realize I'm doing it. Why should i care what other people are wearing... it doesn't effect me at all. Brain stop. nope. ok... do i want to be questioning the thoughts of other people when they woke up and decided they would not match at all and to make sure they get their point across, have totally contradicting colors on.. no i don't want to think that.. but i do. So until i have complete control of the reins latched onto my brain... I'll just walk around being controlled by little green men.